


back to december

by larrynutter



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Established Relationship, M/M, Post-Nogitsune, Song fic, Stiles Stilinski Leaves Beacon Hills, ambiguous time line, but comes back, heavily based off of back to December by Taylor Swift, kinda didn't explain when stiles leaves but hey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:55:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24050956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/larrynutter/pseuds/larrynutter
Summary: “look, ive got dinner on the stove so if you’ve got something to say atleast say it inside, so i don’t have a house doesn’t burn down for the second time.“stiles winced at the comment but took a step inside.derek had been on a mission to get the hale house back up to its former glory and it looks like he did just that.stiles took a step into the living room and noticed all of the homey decorations. lydia definitely had a hand in decorating this place. what caught stiles’ attention was all pictures scattered throughout the room. the walls were plastered with pictures of all of the pack. there were a few pictures of melissa and derek together in the kitchen cooking. hell even the sheriff made it on to the walls
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, implied Erica/Boyd - Relationship
Kudos: 73





	back to december

**Author's Note:**

> i do not own teen wolf or taylor swift's songs.

Stiles walked up to the door and took a deep breath. “You can do this stiles it’ll be fine,” he mumbled to himself. As soon as he sparked up the courage to knock on the door, he was met with a pair of green eyes and a set of intimidating eyebrows to compliment them.

“Dude, hey. Sorry are you on your way somewhere? I can- yanno I can come back another time,” Stiles stuttered out not quite meeting Derek’s eyes.

“No Stiles, I heard your heart beating when you were a mile out from the preserve. what’s going on.”

“Uh, it’s actually really good to see you,” Stiles let his eyes drift down to check out Derek’s body. Yeah, it’s REALLY good to see him for sure.

Derek could feel the intensity of Stiles’ stare increase, as the smell of Stiles’ arousal began to waft towards him.

“Seriously, Stiles?” he grunted with his ears beginning to burn.

“Huh? Oh gods I’m so sorry. I just- was checking in on you I guess. It’s been a while. How’s life? How’s cora? Haven’t seen her in a while,” Stiles tried to muster up a grin but it turned out to be more of a grimace.

“Cora’s is Brazil, but you would know that if you stuck around.” Stiles’ his face went slack as he took in Derek’s expressionless face. He deserved that, but it didn’t make it hurt less. He shouldn’t have come. This was a mistake.

Noticing the boy’s heart rate pick up again, Derek inhaled deeply with his signature eyeroll, then took a step back from the door frame as an invitation for Stiles to come inside. “Look, I’ve got dinner on the stove so if you’ve got something to say atleast say it inside, so I don’t have a house doesn’t burn down for the second time.”

Stiles winced at the comment but took a step inside.

Derek had been on a mission to get the hale house back up to its former glory and it looks like he did just that.

Stiles entered the living room and noticed all of the trendy décor pieces. Lydia definitely had a hand in decorating this place. What caught Stiles’ attention was all pictures scattered throughout the room. The walls were plastered with pictures of all of the pack. There were a few pictures of melissa and derek together in the kitchen cooking. Hell even the sheriff made it on to the walls.

The only person missing was stiles.

“This place looks great, Der.” Stiles turned to face derek who was no longer in the room.

“Erica has been doing a bit of nesting for her son before he’s born, so she’s been working on it with Lydia to be homey for the rest of the pack.” Derek shouted to him from the kitchen.

How did he get there so fast? Ugh werewolves.

Wait. Erica? Son?! 

Barely containing his excitement, Stiles hurried to the kitchen and leaned against the doorframe. “Holy shit! Erica’s pregnant? We’re having a cub soon? That’s so exciting is he gonna have his own room?” Stiles’ energy deflated as he realized he said ‘we.’

Stiles was no longer included in that ‘we’ anymore. Hell he was hardly even pack. Scott would argue that he always would be, but Scott is just a good ass friend.

Derek ignored Stiles’ discomfort and continued stirring the pasta he was preparing.

“What are you doing here stiles,” the older man asked without looking up.

Stiles lowered his eyes to the ground and wrung his hands together. “This is me, swallowing my pride standing in front of you saying: I’m sorry for that night,”

**_ * December _ ** _ **** ** 8, 2019 * ** _

_“Look Der,Ilove you so much. You know how much you mean to me, but you have to understand I can’t live be here anymore. This town has destroyed me andIknow it’s hurt you like hell too. That’s whyI’masking you to come with me. New York is far from Beacon Hills andIswear it’ll be so fucking refreshing not being in a dingy loft,” Stiles chuckled to himself. _

_“Well, we probably would be living in a dingy loft in new york, but at least we wouldn’t be here in beacon hills.” Stiles leaned his back against the kitchen counter._

_“Stiles, our lives are here. Your dad andscottare here.Hell,my family is buried here. We can’t leave.”_

_**really? dead family card. not cool.** Stiles thought to himself _

_“My dad andscottwill be fine. They that understand this is something I need to do.”_

_“The rest of the pack is here.Ican’t leave them, not now.”_

_“Scott can be Mr. True Alpha without you- wait. What do you mean **not now**?”_

_“It was going to be your Christmas surprise.IssacandIhave been planning for weeks and we are finally breaking ground on a spot on the preserve for a new Hale house. It’s going to be bigger than the original.” Derek anxiously picked at a loose rose petal that dangled from the bouquet of roses that laid on the table. He’d brought them as a gift for Stiles for twelve days of christmas._

_“You didn’t think to tell me?Ithought I was clear with how I felt about Beacon Hills. The only good thing about this place is it brought me to you. Think about everything else that’s happened has done to me, to us. You didn’t think this would be somethingI’dwant to know? What other life-changing things do you have planned for our future? Will I have a say in ANYTHING?” Stiles did his award winning hands-on-hips pose that did more scolding than words ever could._

_“In hindsight, you’re not one for surprises, but you know now so what’s the point in moving away?” Derek rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly_

_“Thepoint is this town sucks the life out of everything. I don’t want this for the rest of my life.” _

_“What do you mean by ‘this?’ do you mean us too?” Derek’s expression morphed into sadness._

_“Gods, no babe. That’s whyIwant you to come with me! It’ll be so fantastic living in the city. Something new and fresh.”_

_“No.”Derekinterrupted._

_“No? No what?”_

_“No,I’mnot moving, stiles. As much as I don’t like it, Beacon Hills will always be my home.”_

_“Alrightwell, it’s going to be so hard doing long distance you understand that right?I’mwilling to make it work. Ofcourseyou’d be doing all the trips to New York, but hey think of all the mileage points” Stiles smirked with his eyebrows waggling ridiculously on his forehead._

_“Stiles, just stay with me. Don’t go at all.”_

_“Derek,don’t ask me to do that. I need to leave.” Stiles could feel his anger rising._

_“Why? am I not enough for you to stay,” Derek’s hurt expression made Stiles’ heart clench._

_“That’s not whatIsaid.Ihate when you put words in my fucking mouth.”_

_“Stiles, stay here with me. Everything has been going well here for a while. No monster of the week bothering us. So just stay.”_

_Stiles avoided meetingderek’seyes. If he looked into those stupid yet beautiful green eyes, he would stay in beacon hills forever._

_And that wasn’t something he wanted._

_“I thought you would understand how Ifelt. It’s better to end things here than to have wasted money on flights or dumb shit like that. I think you should go Der.”_

_Derekfelt as if there were bricks on his chest.the wolfstood up from the where he was sitting at the kitchen table and took large strides towards the doorway._

_He stopped in his tracks and turned to stiles. “Nothing is ever wasted on you, Stiles.”_

_Stiles watched asderek’sshadow disappeared from his line of sight and collapsed into one of the kitchen chairs._

_**Did that really happen?** Stiles thought to himself_

_He glanced at the roses derekbrought. When he went to grab them and inhale the fragence, the thorns pricked his palm and his caused him to bleed._

_Almost as if they were mad at him too._

_Needing to take his anger out on something, Stiles broke the stems in half with all his strength and threw it in the trash. Leaving them there to die._

**_ *NOW* _ **   
  


Derek froze before turning off the fire that was heating his pan up and turning his full attention to Stiles.

Stiles took in a shallow breath wanting for Derek to say any fucking thing at this point.

Realizing the wolf was not going to respond any time soon, stiles continued.

“It turns out freedom from Beacon Hills ain’t nothing but missing you. Every snow day, Valentine’s day, and hell even rainy days only made me wish I realized what I had when you were mine. I’d go back to december and turn around and make it all right.”

“Stiles,”

“No gods, let me finish. These days I haven’t even been fucking sleeping. I just stay up replaying me getting on that plane and leaving over and over again. When you’re birthday passed and I didn’t call? It killed me. I wanted to, but I didn’t.”

“Look-“

“Shut up, I’m not done talking. I think about scott losing his inhaler and all the times you caught us up to no good. I think about the times you slammed my head into my steering wheel and how we went from that to realizing we loved each other. Then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind. Fear of being stuck in a place that would always need saving. You gave me all your love. You saved me every time. All I ever gave you was a shitty break up and a shitty goodbye.”

Derek opened his mouth to speak, but Stiles held his hand up signalling he was not done.

“Sourwolf, I miss your tanned skin and your sweet smile with those cute bunny teeth. You were so good to me. So fucking right. I think about how you held me in your arms that september night: it was the first time you ever saw me cry. The nogitsune shit really fucked me up, but you helped me with it all.”

Stiles paused expecting to stop Derek from his rant again, but when Derek showed no intention of speaking this time he continued.

“Maybe, I don’t know. Maybe it’s wishful thinking. It’s probably mindless dreaming, but if you loved me again. I swear I’d love you right.” The younger boy didn’t realize he had taken steps towards derek until they were inches apart.

Stiles waited again. Searching Derek’s face for a response. “But if you don’t want that I understand. I just had to say something. Now it’s your turn to talk,” Stiles noticed that Derek’s slack expression had not changed at all.

Stiles took a couple steps back and began retreating out of the kitchen. He said what he needed to say. It was too late, his opportunity had pack its bags and left when he left for New York.

What Stiles didn’t notice were the the footsteps that followed closely behind him.

Derek finally spoke up as stiles was halfway towards the front door.

“Who ever said I stopped loving you?”

**Author's Note:**

> HI THIS IS MY FIRST FIC AND ITS NOT AT ALL BETA'D SO EVERY MISTAKE IS MY OWN. PLEASE BE NICE I TRIED :(


End file.
